When I see, the vile, nasty treatment that mothers give other mothers on the internet, I quickly become spitting mad. The thoughts that follow in this post are the thoughts of Spitting Mad Rebecca (my husband says this is my alter ego, from here on out known as SMR for short). Consider yourselves
I’m going to say something that might be controversial…
Your parenting style doesn’t matter.
Yep. That’s right, I said it. Whether you are a “free-range” parent or an Attachment parent or a Helicopter parent or any number of the other types of parenting (Google tells me there are a lot), it doesn’t really matter. It doesn’t matter what the books have told you is the best parenting style, or the doctor, or your grandma.
It does not matter whether or not you use the words “nice hands” or “gentle touches” with your kids when they hit others. It doesn’t matter if you cloth diaper or use disposables. It doesn’t matter if you do baby led weaning or give your kid poison…oh I mean canned baby food. Careful who you tell how you feed your baby, I’m told I’m abusive for using organic canned food instead of fresh organic unicorn turds. Silly me.
I know what you are thinking, “Rebecca, how can you say parenting styles don’t matter?”
I’ll tell you how.
Your parenting style doesn’t matter, because the only thing that truly matters when it comes to how you raise your kids is how they see you treating other people.
You may not think anyone is watching when you start telling your husband what fudging morons all the other moms are in your circles, but your kiddo is. They are watching every sign of distain on your face for your fellow human beings. Kids aren’t stupid, they know.
You may not think anyone is listening when you cuss out that mom behind her back who is voting for someone other than your candidate in the current presidential election. Your sweet baby is listening to every word. Every vile, cruel, septic syllable coming off your lips. The same lips that you probably kiss your kids to sleep with.
Sorry to burst your bubble, but no amount of organic unicorn poop is going to fix it when your kid starts acting exactly how you’ve shown them to by your thoughts, words, and actions. Nothing will fix their perception of others if you treat people like repulsive wastes of space and oxygen.
Perhaps instead of spending all that energy you’ve got on verbally crucifying others with your sanctimonious attitude, you could spend a little more time practicing what you preach to your sweet little angels, you know, so that they stay sweet little angels.
Being nice isn’t hard. It doesn’t take that much energy to walk away from a conversation in which you know you will act like a heathen. It does take a lot of time and energy to be a keyboard warrior while you ignore your child who is starving for attention at your feet. But of course, they just don’t understand the importance of you telling internet strangers how ignorant and wrong they are.
Maybe I don’t know what I am talking about. I would hate to waste your time telling you that your attachment parenting is useless if you behave like a lunatic, but I mean what do I really know? It isn’t like kids learn by observing and imitating what they see.
Whoever made that “monkey see, monkey do” thing must’ve just been smoking something…
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