Back when I was in some popular “crunchy” mom groups on social media, Nurse-Ins were (and I’m sure still are) all the rage. Usually a Nurse-In was set up when a business had asked a breastfeeding mom to cover up while nursing, and a group of mothers would go to that business and sit outside of it nursing any way they deemed fit (however demure or flamboyantly that ended up being), claiming they were window shopping so they wouldn’t get in legal trouble. A lot of the mothers would get excited, ecstatic even, when there was a possibility of a Nurse-In. Even some of the mothers I had a great deal of respect for participated wholeheartedly. They thrived on talking about breastfeeding rights, and regularly invited me to join them.
I never did. I didn’t want to. But that alone would never be a good enough reason for them (and when put to the test, wasn’t), because many acted as if a person who didn’t physically show up at a business to feed their baby because another breastfeeding mom had been wronged there was worthy of the highest form of social justice warrioring to “educate” on why it is a necessity to keep our breastfeeding rights.
Instead of telling them I simply didn’t want to go, I made up excuses, saying I had prior plans or was busy. The truth is, I just don’t want to insert myself in the business of other people. Now that I’ve gotten away from the enraged, oppressed motherhood culture, I have realized that I had other reasons that I hadn’t yet fleshed out for myself for not wanting to go. It was mere “gut instinct” at the time, not something I could articulate while constantly being asked to tax my adrenals and sacrifice my decent blood pressure to be angry on behalf of someone else solely based on one side of the situation.
Before I got pregnant with my son, I had never really heard much about breastfeeding. I knew my little cousins were breastfed, but I also knew a lot of moms who fed their babies formula. In fact, I babysat a baby who drank formula. I actually thought it was really cool, and I had a lot of fun to mix it up and feed it to him and he was always very content about it.
I never believed that breastfeeding or formula was better, or gave any thought to what I would do with my child. That is, until I got pregnant.Continue Reading
I don’t know if I’ve just been blessed with being on EVERY SINGLE corner of the internet where insanity is bred, or maybe I’m just unlucky. Either way, I’ve seen a lot of people argue over the inane things. Politics, I get. Religion, I get. Boobs...seriously? If you are making boobs controversial just to create an argument with someone, you have a problem.
Sorry, was that too harsh? All of this has just eaten my brain, you see. Especially the part that allows me to sympathize with people who enjoy rage porn and mommy wars.Continue Reading
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